13. August 2010 by John Schinnerer.

It’s August 12th! Less than 2 weeks left before school starts!

You know what time it is!

Time for Back to School Rehab!

Teacher: ‘So students, did everyone have a wonderful Summer?

Okay, glad to hear it.

Now I know you’ve spent the past 3 months playing video games, tweeting and texting on your phones, and fondling the remote control mindlessly, so it’s time for some brief solution-focused group therapy.

How many of you can focus on one thing for longer than 3 seconds?

How many of you have heard of a handheld wireless tool called a ‘book?’

Let’s see a show of hands please….hold them up. Okay, 2 of you.

In that case, let’s talk about addiction.

Johnny, I need you to stop moving your thumbs.

Yes, just use your thoughts, dear. Really, you can stop fidgeting using your mind!

I know it’s difficult, dear. Just give it a try.

The withdrawals from your iPhones, video games and laptops seem just as bad as nicotine detox.

Addiction is when you can’t stop thinking about where your next fix is coming from. So if all you can think about is getting home to fire up WOW or COD, you just might be addicted!

Call of Duty (COD)

Addiction is when you spend all your energy focusing on how your going to get your next fix. So if you are counting the seconds from first period to the end of the school day while worrying about playing Angry Birds on the iPhone, you just might be addicted!

Remember, quitting technology cold turkey can be brutal.

So if you need a fix during the school day, we were just got in some brand new Kindles. You can use them in the meantime to quiet those nasty eye twitches and finger tics.

Alright. I’m glad we had the chance to have this little chat. There’s the school bell.

ON YOUR MARK…

GET SET…

LEARN!’

Enjoy!

John Schinnerer Ph.D.

Posted in Gender differences, Parenting adolescents, SRVHS, San Francisco Bay Area, De-escalating anger, Real Men Real Emotion, Free self-help book, Emotional terrorists, Anger management therapy, Self-help book, Visual Attention, Psychological Humor - Jokes, Guide To Self Beginners Guide To Managing Emotion, School psychology, Creativity, Dr. John Schinnerer, Parenting, Emotional management, Danville CA, Emotion & learning, Psychology humor, Managing stress | Print | No Comments »

1. July 2010 by John Schinnerer.

I’m kicking off the launch of my new video blog at drjohnsblog.wordpress.com. And to make the announcement fun for all, I thought I’d offer a FREE copy of my book Guide To Self: The Beginner’s Guide To Managing Emotion and Thought.

It’s all about how to quiet the voices in your head, turn down the volume on negative emotions and turn up the volume on positive emotions, click here for instant access!

So if you want a free PDF version of some of the latest proven tools to manage your mind, the latest methods to increase your happiness via positive psychology, the greatest tips to manage your anger, check it out! Click here for a fantastic freebie!

Enjoy!

John

Posted in National speakers, Neuropsychology, Emotion & learning, Danville CA, Psychological Humor - Jokes, Emotion & productivity, ADHD, Science of love, Mindfulness, Resiliency, Assertiveness, Hope, Curiosity, Unsconscious mind, Meaning-making, Self-motivation, Psychoneuroimmunology, Men's feelings, Real Men Real Emotion, Self-improvement book, Self-help book, De-escalating anger, Well-being, Emotion & Athletics, Optimal Human Functioning, Self-compassion, Awe & Elevation, San Francisco Bay Area, Relationships, The human brain, Anxiety, Emotional IQ, Staying calm, Social anxiety disorder, Social phobia, Nervousness, Life coach, Creativity, Forgiveness, Positive Psychology, Realistic optimism, Managing stress, Dr. John Schinnerer, Tips to help anxiety, Happiness, Dealing with loss, Anger Management, Managing Sadness, Subconscious mind, Men's emotions, Alexithymia, Managing Anxiety, Emotional management, Depression, Guide To Self Beginners Guide To Managing Emotion, Parenting, Rational mind, Emotional mind, Counseling | Print | No Comments »

26. May 2010 by John Schinnerer.

 (Note: This is humor!) 

1. You start out each morning with a 30-minute jog around the bathroom.

2. You write to your mother in Denmark every week, even though she sends you mail from Ohio asking why you never write.

3. You wear your boxers on your head because you heard it will ward of evil alien spirits.

4. You begin to stop and consider all of the blades of grass you’ve stepped on as a child, and worry that their ancestors are going to one day seek revenge.

5. You have meaningful conversations with your toaster.

6. Your father pretends you don’t exist, just to play along with your little illusion.

7. You put tennis balls in the microwave to see if they’ll hatch.

8. Your dentist asks you why each one of your teeth has your name etched on it and you say it’s for security reasons.

9. You tend to agree with everything your mother’s dead uncle tells you.

10. You argue with yourself about which is better, to be eaten by a koala or to be loved by an infectious disease.

Have a mirth-filled week!

Dr. John Schinnerer

Guide To Self, Inc.

Positive Psychology Coach

Author of #1 Positive Psych blog on the web

Keynote speaker

Swell guy

Posted in Psychological Humor - Jokes, Danville CA, Emotion & learning, Optimal Human Functioning, Alamo CA, Well-being, San Francisco Bay Area, Curiosity, Psychology humor, Happiness, Creativity, Dr. John Schinnerer, Depression, Emotional management, Resiliency, Anger Management, Positive Psychology | Print | No Comments »

8. January 2010 by John Schinnerer.

Check out this 40 minute Quicktime presentation on positive psychology from a humorous perspective. It will provide you with a much needed boost - laughter, motivation, insight and challenge.

John Schinnerer, Ph.D. speaking on positive psychology, resiliency and emotional management.

http://www.jobconnections.org/speaker4.shtml

Keep up the courage. Stay the course. Look for little steps of improvement. Make your resolutions habitual. You can do it!

Happy New Year!

John Schinnerer, PhD

Posted in Emotion & productivity, Employee engagement, Danville CA, National speakers, Awareness, Overcoming failure, San Ramon CA, Positive emotions and job search, Brain plasticity, Optimal Human Functioning, Visual Attention, Executive coach, Psychological Humor - Jokes, Hope, Mindfulness, Guide To Self Beginners Guide To Managing Emotion, Emotional mind, Anxiety, Guide to Self, Managing stress, Dr. John Schinnerer, Emotional management, Managing Anxiety, The human brain, Resiliency, Consciousness, Managing Sadness, Anger Management, Positive Psychology | Print | No Comments »

15. October 2009 by John Schinnerer.

Some Quick Jokes

The pollution is so bad that when I put air in my tires, two of them died.’ Lee Tully

‘I was thrown out of NYU. On the metaphysics final I looked w/in the soul of the boy sitting next to me.’ Woody Allen

My dog is half Labrador, half pit bull. Great dog. Sure, he might bite off my leg , but he’ll bring it back to me.

When dogs laugh, they laugh with their tails. What puts humans at a higher state of evolution is that we got our laugh at the right end!

My sister had a sick hamster. She took it to the vet - that’s like taking a disposable lighter in for repairs. (a la Wayne Cotter)

‘Don’t let the elephants watch the rabbits!” Noah’s wife

My grandpa got thrown out of a mime show for having a seizure. They thought he was heckling!

Bumper sticker humor… Don’t get even. Get ODD!

Bumper sticker humor … Reality is 4 people who have no imagination.

I love the man that can smile in trouble, that can gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflection.

– Thomas Paine (1737-1809)

Have a thriving Thursday!

John Schinnerer, Ph.D.

Positive Psychology Coach

Danville, CA 94526

www.GuideToSelf.com

Posted in National speakers, Psychology humor, Danville CA, Emotion & productivity, Psychological Humor - Jokes, Hope, Emotional management, Dr. John Schinnerer, Managing stress, Creativity, Guide to Self, Happiness, Positive Psychology | Print | No Comments »