11. December 2008 by John Schinnerer.

Check out this performance by Benjamin Zander at TED. Short, simple, and a powerful take home message.

http://www.ted.com/index.php/talks/benjamin_zander_on_music_and_passion.html

All the best,
John Schinnerer

Guide To Self, Inc.

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18. November 2008 by John Schinnerer.

By John Schinnerer, Ph.D.The boss’ face is red with rage as he screams obscenities at his subordinate. The boss yells words he will later regret. The subordinate focuses on breathing deeply and staying calm as he watches his boss spin out of emotional control. In the face of his boss’ fury, the subordinate remains composed and, thus, is able to think clearly. When the manager finishes his tirade, the 25-year-old subordinate asserts himself, ‘I understand you are upset. It frustrates me when you yell at me. I need you to speak to me in a calm tone of voice.’Assertiveness is the courage to do the right thing, at the right time, in the right manner, despite a known risk of negative consequences. Assertiveness basically comes down to courage – the courage to do what you know is right, in your heart, despite the possibility of negative consequences. Assertiveness exists on a continuum between the poles of docile and aggressive. Think of assertiveness as a matter of degree; it exists on a 1 through 10 scale where 1 is meek and 10 is overly aggressive. For most people, assertiveness varies according to the situation. For example, the hard-nosed, results-driven executive may be highly assertive at work, yet be quite meek when it comes to dealing with his wife and teenage daughter at home. So assertiveness is environment-specific. Usually, your degree of assertiveness is couched within a role that you play – parent, spouse, boss, friend, and so on. The goal is to learn how to be appropriately assertive without being a bully.  While difficult, it is possible with practice and awareness.Stop Being a WimpMost people are wimps, at least to some degree, in some situation. Wimps are people who cannot or will not say ‘No’ mainly out of fear. You may be a ubiquitous wimp which means that you are wimpy in every situation, with everyone. Or you may be a situation-specific wimp. These wimps can be a tyrant at work and a pushover at home, forceful with strangers yet completely spineless with friends. Wimpiness can vary according to the situation. Many wimps feel more comfortable being assertive in some areas of their life than others. Please understand that I use the term ‘wimp’ with respect and understanding. I work on my own assertiveness continuously. Understand that being a wimp works pretty well in the short run because you don’t risk upsetting anyone. You just let others have their way and no one’s knickers get in a knot. However, in the long run, your anger and disappointment get buried deep inside you. As you try to stuff more and more anger inside your emotional gas tank, the tank eventually overflows resulting in irritation, or even outbursts of rage as well as passive-aggressive behavior. You get angry at the wrong people, people who don’t deserve your wrath. Holding your emotions inside can also lead to physical symptoms such as headaches, stomachaches, high blood pressure, stroke, and even heart attacks. In short, wimpiness is bad for you and destructive to your health and happiness. For a meaningful, happy and healthy life, you must learn to be appropriately assertive. So what can you do? How do you stop being a wimp and start being assertive?Identify Your Top ValuesFirst, identify those values that are most important to you. The purpose for identifying your deepest values is to give you some guidance during difficult or confusing times. When your values are clear, it’s much easier to decide upon a course of action and act with confidence.  Your values will be the foundation of your new assertiveness. Ask yourself the following questions…What do I value? With what degree of certainty?Which values am I willing to publicly declare?What values am I willing to die for?Once you’ve identified your values, then you must figure out how consistent your words are with your feelings, thoughts and actions.The more authentic you are, the greater your quality of life is. Authenticity means that your values are consistent with your words, feelings and actions. The greater the consistency between your internal world and your external world, the more authenticity you have. Values guide the whole thing, your whole life.  Values give you a decision-making framework. Values are most important when you are under duress. Values are critical when you are stressed out, depressed or tired. However, in order for them to be any use to you at all, you have to know your top 5 values by rote. They have to be automatic, unconscious, repeated over and over until they are known by heart. It’s not enough to look at them once or twice a year. Infrequent value visits are not enough to sear them into your long-term memory. To get you started, a list of the top values that exist throughout the world is available free of charge at Guide To Self.  

Figure Out How You Want Others to Treat YouIf you want other people to treat you differently, you need to know how you want to be treated. Do you want your wife to stop yelling at you? Do you want more respect from your husband? Do you want your boss to speak to you in an indoor tone of voice? Do you want your children to help pick up the house? Figure out exactly how you want other people in your life to treat you.  Look at what is making you angry or irritated throughout the day. Make a mental note of each thing. Then figure out what you’d like to change in each relationship in your life. In which areas of your life is there injustice?  What are you tolerating? What are you putting up with? As you unearth the answers to these questions, the priorities for assertive action will automatically unfold.  Ask for What You Want After you have figured out how you want to be treated, then ask for it. This step takes courage, yet it gets easier the more frequently you do it. And it’s not as hard as you believe it is. You must learn to express yourself, the real you; what you truly want; how you truly feel, if you want to be treated with more respect. When you learn to state how you feel and what you want, your whole life will begin to change for the better. When you are asking for what you want, be as specific as possible. Keep it as short as possible and hold that thought in your mind, that way you can hold onto it even in the midst of an emotionally-charged conversation. To stop being a wimp, act with courage. It may feel awkward at first. Every new behavior feels a little strange at first. Most new behaviors take roughly 4 weeks to take hold. After four weeks, your authentic communication of your thoughts, feelings and needs will fit like a glove and you’ll be wondering why you hadn’t done it sooner. Practice Saying ‘No’Many of us have gotten in a dangerous habit of saying ‘Yes’ to everyone and everything. However, it’s merely a bad habit which can be changed. If you have trouble with saying ‘No,’ if that is too uncomfortable, simply use the phrase, ‘I’ll think about it.’  This is merely a temporary stop-gap. It buys you time. Using the phrase ‘I’ll think about it’ will hold off the other party for a time, but it raises your anxiety because you are only delaying giving a final answer. So realize that the ultimate goal is to be able to say ‘No’ with a clear conscience. You have a right to say ‘No’ to any request that comes your way. You have an obligation to take care of yourself first and foremost.  

Learn to Love Change The next step in becoming more assertive is to learn to love change. As you begin to live by your values and become more assertive, your relationships will change. You are going to make some changes to your life and the way in which you interact with other people. In addition, the only unchanging thing in this life is the fact that change will be constant. The best you can do is learn to love change. Identify What Makes You Afraid – And Go After ItMany of us wimps have created massive fears over what will happen when we finally say ‘No.’ We get into catastrophic, all-or-nothing negative thinking. Most often, these are irrational fears that have been blown up to monstrous proportions. Odds are that none of these things will actually happen if you stand up and rightly assert yourself. Remember to challenge your fears and your negative thoughts. Often, thoughts and feelings do not tell the truth. It is important to challenge negative thoughts. Don’t let them go by without speaking back to them. Check them against reality. Check your thoughts out with other people. Find out what people you trust have to say about the matter.Please realize that assertiveness is NOT the same as aggressiveness. You don’t have to be rude or impolite to be assertive. You don’t have to attack someone to let them know of your thoughts and your feelings. You have the right to stand up for your rights. You have the right to say ‘No’ and to take proper care of yourself. You have the right to stand up and ask for what you want and need. The worst that can happen is that they say ‘No. You can’t have that.’In any case, you need to know what makes your life worth living. And then stand up for it. Ask for it. Fight for it. Work towards it. Pay attention to it. You have to know what you want before you can be assertive. If you don’t know, you can’t ask. SummaryIn closing, keep in mind that assertiveness requires some courage. Courage only exists when you feel some degree of fear. The act of overcoming your fear is known as courage.  Assertiveness is the courage to do the right thing, at the right time, in the right manner despite possible adverse consequences. Think of assertiveness on a 1 to 10 scale where 1 is meek and 10 is overly aggressive. Assertiveness usually varies by situation. It is environment-specific. The ultimate goal is to learn how to be properly assertive without using intimidation to get what you want. About the Author
Dr. John Schinnerer

Dr. John Schinnerer is in private practice helping men learn anger management, stress management and latest ways to deal with destructive negative emotions. His practice is located in the Danville-San Ramon Medical Center at 913 San Ramon Valley Blvd., #280, Danville, California 94526. He graduated summa cum laude from U.C. Berkeley with a Ph.D. in psychology. Dr. Schinnerer has been an executive and psychologist for over 10 years. Dr. John Schinnerer is President and Founder of Guide To Self, a company that coaches clients to their potential using the latest in positive psychology, mindfulness and attentional control. Dr. John Schinnerer hosted over 200 episodes of Guide To Self Radio, a prime time radio show, in the San Francisco Bay Area.  Dr. Schinnerer is President of Infinet Assessment, a psychological testing company to help firms select the best applicants. Dr. Schinnerer’s areas of expertise range from positive psychology, to emotional awareness, to moral development, to sports psychology. Dr. Schinnerer wrote the award-winning, “Guide To Self: The Beginner’s Guide To Managing Emotion and Thought,” which is available at Amazon.com, BarnesAndNoble.com and AuthorHouse.com.  

Posted in emotional mind, emotional management, depression, Guide To Self Beginners Guide To Managing Emotion, morals and values, Managing Anxiety, anger management, Resiliency, assertiveness, Men's emotions, Alexithymia, Managing Sadness, happiness, Tips to help anxiety, life coach, guide to self, dr. john schinnerer, managing stress, business, emotional intelligence, anxiety, social phobia, nervousness, social anxiety disorder, staying calm, positive psychology | Print | No Comments »

30. October 2008 by John Schinnerer.

Latest News:

Dr. Schinnerer is proud to announce he is opening a private practice to coach men in the latest ways to manage their anger, fear and sadness. The practice opens November 15th, 2008 at the Danville-San Ramon Medical Center on 913 San Ramon Valley Blvd., Suite 280, in Danville CA 94526. For appointments, please call (925) 575-0258.

Posted in parenting, emotional mind, emotional management, depression, Guide To Self Beginners Guide To Managing Emotion, Ethics, morals and values, Managing Anxiety, anger management, Relationships, Resiliency, The human brain, Men's emotions, Managing Sadness, Alexithymia, happiness, Tips to help anxiety, managing stress, dr. john schinnerer, realistic optimism, business, positive psychology, forgiveness, life coach, guide to self, nervousness, social phobia, social anxiety disorder, staying calm, emotional intelligence, anxiety, Counseling | Print | No Comments »

2. October 2008 by John Schinnerer.

By Dr. John Schinnerer

www.GuideToSelf.com

Each one of us has an emotional gas tank inside us. Inside most of us, our emotional gas tanks are filled with anger, sadness and fear, and other destructive emotions. Destructive emotions build up over time. They accumulate. Destructive emotions, such as anager, literally eat you from the inside out by damaging the inside of your arteries.

As an example, let’s look more in depth at anger. Anger is difficult to control yet it is predictable. It begins like a single drop of water. At first, it’s merely irritating. No big deal, just aggravating. Slowly, gradually, over time, anger accumulates. Some bonehead zips into the parking space for which you were patiently waiting. A guy in a hurry cuts you off on the freeway. Your boss is mistakenly upset with you because of a error a coworker made. The waitress takes forever to get your order and you are running late. When you finally arrive home, exhausted, your children are boisterous and energetic. Tiny drops of water slowly filling up your emotional gas tank. Drip. Drop. Drip. Drop. And when you gather together enough of these little drops of annoyance, you have unknowingly filled your tank with rage and anger. You are now jump to judgment. You are fast to fury. You instantly become irritated. Over time, over years and years of this pattern, you learn to trust no one. You learn to be expect the worst from people. You build a wall to shield you from more pain. And the quality of your life gradually becomes miserable. It’s insidious. Without awareness, you become an emotional time bomb that explodes under any additional difficulties.

There is a better way to live. It requires learning the human strength of forgiveness. Forgiveness takes some awareness and practice, but it can be learned.

All you have to do is learn how to dump out your emotional gas tank. Turn it upside down and release every last bit of negative emotions – anger, fear, disappointment and sadness. Once you’ve emptied your tank, you have the option of filling it up with what you choose – love, joy, peace and patience.

The problem is that no one ever taught you HOW to empty out your gas tank of these destructive emotions. Once you learn how to dump out all that rage and pain, then you have a choice. Then you will have a life of which you can be proud.

To find out how the specific steps to forgive and dump out your destructive emotions, you can enjoy the full article for free at
http://www.guidetoself.com/articles/Forgiveness-WhatWhyHow.pdf

Posted in staying calm, anxiety, emotional intelligence, social anxiety disorder, nervousness, morals and values, Infinet Assessment, happiness, guide to self, life coach, positive psychology, Counseling, Bullies, forgiveness, business, dr. john schinnerer, managing stress, Sports Psychology | Print | No Comments »

1. October 2008 by John Schinnerer.

Imagine your favorite football team playing in the Super Bowl. Your team has a great defensive unit. However, they have a terrible offense. While they can prevent the other team from scoring, they cannot put points on the board themselves.  It is highly difficult to win with defense alone.

For the past century, sports psychology and psychology, in general, have focused on building a good defense in the face of human suffering and loss. However, we’ve done so at the cost of finding reliable ways to help people move to more meaningful and satisfying lives. Positive psychology is bringing more balance to the field, so that psychologists, sports psychologists and clients alike can easily bob up and down over the vicissitudes of life, using their strengths to create more positive emotions and ultimately win the game of life. Positive psychology helps you move from surviving to thriving.

Life is a game. Play it well. Having talent alone does not guarantee success. Those who rise to their potential share a common set of beliefs that compel them to work hard, live according to their values and have a long-term plan.

Dr. John Schinnerer, Guide To Self, Inc.

http://www.guidetoself.com/index.html

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11. June 2008 by John Schinnerer.

Most people like to enjoy the illusion that they are rational consumers. However, more and more studies are demonstrating the powerful impact that emotions play in buying decisions. In a recent study in the Journal of Consumer Research, researchers found that customers in an angry mood make different purchasing decisions than customers in a sad mood, demonstrating that negative emotions vary in how they influence consumer decision-making.  

Angry Mood Makes Consumers More Likely to Stick to Their Guns 

Angry consumers were 37% more likely to stick with their existing choices than sad individuals. In other words, angry individuals are less likely to see the advantages or benefits of a new product or service. People in an irritable or angry mood become cognitively rigid, which is to say, their neural nets are knotted. Until they calm down, new information will be ignored. 

Sad Mood Still Open to Options  On the other hand, individuals who were sad behaved the same as those in a neutral mood (i.e., a 5 on a 1 to 10 scale) when it came to consumer decision making. In contrast, folks in a funk (i.e., sad sacks) have a tendency to look at options closely and carefully and then make the best decision based on the information at hand.  Take Home Message   Different negative emotions influence behavior differently yet predictably. If you know how someone is feeling, you can predict (within a certain range) how they will behave.  For example, if you sell consumer packaged goods, you are more likely to sell new products to sad consumers than angry ones. Individuals in an angry mood are significantly more likely to stick with status quo. Angry peoples’ thoughts comingle with, and are influenced by, an angry mood. As a result, they tend to overfocus and dwell on their anger and, typically, do not look at options or possibilities.  A mood of sadness or melancholy gives one the chance to reflect and a willingness to ponder a variety of possibilities. This is typically done in an attempt to self-correct one’s mood towards a neutral middle ground.  Conclusion  As an individual, be wary of making any important decisions when you are angry. You could be missing some fantastic opportunities! As a corporation, have your finger continuously on the pulse of how your customers feel.  Awareness of the mood of the consumer can lead to a more engaging, pleasant and profitable relationship.  John Schinnerer, Ph.D.Emotion Mining Company, Inc.

www.EmotionMining.com

Incidental and Task-Related Affect: A Re-Inquiry and Extension of the Influence of Choice. Journal of Consumer Research. June 2005.

Author Information

Dr. Schinnerer is Chief Communication Officer at Emotion Mining Company, which has a powerful method to accurately quantify emotions to help craft successful change initiatives, improve brand equity, increase effectiveness of marketing campaigns, remove roadblocks to team building and allow for new scientific research.  The EM method was designed and fine-tuned over the last 15 years by a Stanford psychiatrist and neuroscientist and tested with Fortune 500 companies, such as AOL, Coke, Penske, Campbell’s, and Purina, with unparalleled results.In the past, Dr. Schinnerer has served as President of Guide To Self (http://www.guidetoself.com), a company that focuses on executive coaching and positive psychology.  Dr. Schinnerer also hosted Guide To Self Radio, a prime time radio show on positive psychology and emotional management.  Dr. Schinnerer started in the private sector as President of Infinet Assessment (http://www.infinetassessment.com), a psychological testing company to help firms select the best applicants. Dr. Schinnerer wrote the book “Guide To Self: The Beginner’s Guide To Managing Emotion and Thought” (Available at Amazon.com, Target.com and BarnesAndNoble.com) and many articles such as “The Marketing Revolution: Connecting Behavior with the Subconscious Mind.” His book was awarded “Best Self-Help Book of 2007.” 

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23. March 2008 by John Schinnerer.

The Solution to the Chief Marketing Officer’s Dilemma – Accurate Emotional Engagement Metrics 

By Dr. John L. Schinnerer and Shirley Knight 

On average, companies change CMOs every two years. Is this a function of unrealistic expectations, unclear job requirements, or something more fundamental? Perhaps the solution is as simple as accurately measuring that which truly bonds consumers to brands – emotional engagement. The task of linking consumer behavior to brands and marketing efforts is a difficult one with which the best Chief Marketing Officers’ grapple daily. Solutions such as self-report surveys, focus groups, and in-depth interviews suffer from a critical disconnect between their results and consumers’ real world behavior. This ongoing challenge has put Chief Marketing Officers (CMOs) into the unenviable position where their best efforts are not measureable, and as a result their job security is never assured.  The CMO’s Dilemma  In his April 2008 Gallup Management Journal article “The Chief Marketing Officer’s Dilemma,” Willam J. McEwen looks at some of the difficulties of the CMO position – rapid turnover, high pressure expectations, and a poorly defined job.  The CMO position faces inherent difficulties in the sense that customer engagement depends upon  a) Communicating the brand promise and b) Delivering upon the company’s brand promise.    Both consumer engagement and profitability rise when employees help deliver on the brand promise. The difficulty arises in that the CMO has control over the first half of the equation (communicating brand promise via advertising and marketing) but not the second half (delivering upon brand promise via employees and operations). The CMO has no direct control over the workforce. They control the packaging, promotion and promise, but not the daily deliverance and implementation. Thus, to a large extent, the real potential, and the potential pitfalls, of the brand are in the hands of employees who are outside of the CMO’s control.  Gallup’s Proposed Solution The solution to the dilemma is two pronged. First, CMOs must be capable of recognizing and understanding the entire breadth of their brand – from the brand’s promise to each interaction between employee and customer to every experience customers have with the brand. This indicates that CMOs must “look at the world from the customer’s point of view.” Second, senior executives must design more comprehensive, well-defined objectives and accountability measures for their CMOs. However, this solution proposed by Mr. McEwen falls short of the target. The assessment of the problem and its respective solutions can be extended to incorporate a broader view of the mind, the market, the brand and the CMO – a view which involves both sides of the mind, the rational and the emotional, and allows for a more accurate picture of engagement, branding and profitability. 

Rational vs. Emotional Mind 

From a neuromarketing perspective, there are at least two parts to the human mind – the rational and the emotional.   The rational mind is reasonable, logical, and linear. The rational mind is excellent at developing levelheaded explanations for behavior. It is so good it has consumers (and others) convinced that they are rational shoppers. The rational mind is so good at creating the illusion that it is in control that scientists didn’t even discover the emotional mind until a few decades ago. In other words, the rational mind has conveniently overlooked the existence of the emotional mind ever since Descartes’ famous but flawed line, “I think, therefore I am.” The emotional mind is associative, largely subconscious, irrational and intense. The emotional mind is more powerful than the rational mind. It had greater endurance than the rational mind. It works more quickly than the rational mind. This is partially due to the order in which the brain evolved over millions of years. Those areas of the brain which are primarily responsible for emotions, the hippocampus, the amygdala, and the insula, among other regions, developed 5 – 10 million years ago. On the other hand, the part of the brain responsible for rational thought, the neocortex, developed a mere 40,000 – 2 million years ago. In terms of evolutionary brain development, the rational mind is still in its infancy, while the emotional mind is like a mature adult. So the emotional mind has been through hundreds of revisions and updates, while the rational mind is still a bit ‘buggy.’ Research confirms the emotional mind is a more powerful driver of behavior. Consumers buy with the emotional mind and explain the purchase (to their spouse, for instance) with rational mind. The Importance of Fully Engaged Customers 

Gallup has convincingly shown that “profitable growth is directly dependent on the degree to which a company’s customers are ‘fully engaged.’”  Gallup defines “fully engaged customers” as “strongly emotionally attached and attitudinally loyal.” On the other hand, actively disengaged customers are “completely detached from your company…they may become virulently antagonistic toward your company or brand…they’re always eager to tell others exactly how they feel.” The inevitability of negative customer-employee interactions and subsequent drops in customer engagement make it imperative that the CMO find a way to accurately quantify and measure emotional engagement.  With an accurate method to lay out the conscious and subconscious emotions that consumers feel when they interact with the brand, the CMO has a fighting chance to ensure customers return again and again for the same “feel good” experience. Once the CMO has this emotional profile for the brand, then she can set about focusing on “increasing sales share …while meaningfully enhancing the brand.” Until then, the CMO is akin to a ship atop the sea without a rudder; adrift without a map.  Emotions and the Subconscious Drive Behavior 

Emotions and the subconscious are the primary driving forces behind consumer behavior, including buying behavior. The challenge has been to develop a tool to accurately identify and measure conscious and subconscious emotions in real time. In the absence of any such tool, CMO’s have had to rely on basic, rudimentary methods, such as observation of shopping behavior, self-report questionnaires and focus groups to predict engagement and behavior. These methods have proven inconclusive at best.  The CMO’s job security is thus tied to shaky and unreliable data collection methods. Given how consumer data is still being collected in archaic ways, it’s no wonder that the tenure in the CMO position is so short. The problem is not that the CMO does or does not know how to do the job. The problem is that no one knows how to accurately measure emotional engagement so there are no real benchmarks against which performance can be judged.  

Communicating Brand Promise  The creator of the most successful mass-communication ad campaigns for Avis and Volkswagen, William Bernbach, said, “You can say the right thing about a product, and nobody will listen.  You’ve got to say it in such a way that people will feel it in their gut. Because if they don’t feel it, nothing will happen.”   The value of brand equity is not so much in the rational, conscious mind as it is in the emotional, subconscious mind. It’s not how consumers think about a company or its offerings. It’s how they feel about it. And oftentimes, they’re not even consciously aware of how they feel.  The most successful marketing campaigns will speak to the head and the heart, the rational and the emotional. Yet, for most CMOs, the ability to accurately measure the emotional side of the equation is not an option, if, for no other reason, than no adequate emotional ruler exists.   The one company which has best delivered on the promise of measuring emotional engagement is the aptly named, Emotion Mining Company. Emotion Mining Company has developed an online, projective technique which enables accurate and reliable measurement of the emotional mind. This information is as essential as it is unprecedented and as such it makes sense that Emotion Mining’s tool be standard for every company that wants to reach consumers at a gut level. Delivering On Brand Promise 

The second part of the CMO’s dilemma, delivering upon the brand’s promise, also has an essential emotional component to it. This should come as no surprise as we are still dealing with humans who are quintessentially emotional beings.  It is well understood that employee satisfaction is positively linked to profitability.  The more engaged employees are, the better their interactions with customers; the better the interactions with customers, the more loyalty generated; and customer loyalty equals profit.  To truly leverage employee engagement, find out how employees really feel about the customer base in general. If a call center representative thinks of and, more importantly, feels that customers are like incapable, annoying children, their interactions will obviously suffer. If a call center rep sees the customers as sources of innovative ideas who are in genuine need of help, their interactions will flourish and the brand will gain new champions as a result of their positive exchanges.  Even though delivery of the brand promise is outside the CMO’s purview, she can still influence her colleagues who oversee delivery by acquiring and sharing a deeper, more accurate, understanding of a) how the consumer perceives the brand and b) how the consumer wants to experience the brand. In this way, the CMO provides the company with the necessary hard data to create the finest possible customer experience. Such information in the hands of senior management would be a powerful driver of organizational change and brand enhancement as it creates positive guidelines for promotion and delivery.  Measuring the emotional responses of consumers is an aspect of market research that is just now coming to the fore, creating new and necessary tools for the marketing toolbox.  Dr. Tom Snyder, the founder of Emotion Mining Company Inc., whose method identifies conscious and subconscious emotional reactions to a question, brand or concept, states, “The emotion data – both quantitative and qualitative – is generated in less than a month and provides previously unavailable insights into the consumer’s perspective. As a result our clients, such as Coca-Cola, have been able to better target both marketing and delivery.” As McEwen suggested in his article, CMOs need to look at the world from their customer’s point of view, and senior management need to design more comprehensive, well-defined objectives and accountability measures for their CMO’s.  Recognizing the role of emotions and measuring emotional responses provides competitive advantage for the firm as well as job security for the CMO! About the Authors:
 Dr. John Schinnerer is Director of Client Relations for Emotion Mining Company which offers a novel, patented method to measure conscious and subconscious emotions and thoughts. In the past, Dr. Schinnerer has served as President of Guide To Self (http://www.guidetoself.com), a company that focuses on executive coaching.  Dr. Schinnerer also hosted Guide To Self Radio, a prime time radio show on positive psychology and emotional management.  Dr. Schinnerer started in the private sector as President of Infinet Assessment (http://www.infinetassessment.com), a psychological testing company to help firms select the best applicants. Dr. Schinnerer wrote the book “Guide To Self: The Beginner’s Guide To Managing Emotion and Thought” and the article “The Marketing Revolution: Connecting Behavior with the Subconscious Mind.” His book was awarded the “Best Self-Help Book of 2007.” 

Shirley Knight is an Executive MBA from Queens University who has 30 years experience in banking and insurance, fulfilling roles in leadership, sales, relationship management, and change management. Shirley joined Emotion Mining (http://www.emotionmining.com) as COO to help clients gain access to unique insights that can build more competitive organizations.

Posted in new approaches to organizational change initiatives, chief marketing officer, brand equity, customer engagement, unique marketing research, innovative brand research, dr. john schinnerer, emotional intelligence, emotion mining company, business | Print | No Comments »

3. March 2008 by John Schinnerer.

Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Anxiety (But Were Too Afraid To Ask)!

Dr. John Schinnerer, Emotion Mining Company (www.EmotionMining.com)

Anxiety is the third largest psychological problem in the world today but few people are even aware what anxiety is. A young man wastes time sitting in front of the telephone, agonizing becausehe’s afraid to make a call. He’s afraid to call a stranger in a business officeabout the phone bill because he’s afraid he’ll be imposing and they’ll be madwith him. It’s very hard for him to take rejection, even over the phone, evenfrom someone she doesn’t know. He’s especially afraid to call people he doesknow because he feels that he’ll be calling at the wrong time — the otherperson will be busy — and they won’t want to talk with him. He feels rejectedeven before he makes the call. Once the call is finished, he overanalyzes andthinks about the words that were used, the tone it was said in, and how hewas perceived by the other person….his nervousness and speeding thoughtsconcerning the call prove to him that he “screwed” this conversation up, too,just like he always does. Just thinking about the call is enough to call us hisanxiety. A young lady resists going to work since a meeting is scheduled the nextday. She knows that such meetings always include her co-workers discussingtheir current projects. The mere thought of talking in front of her peersspikes her anxiety. Sometimes she loses sleep the night before due to theanticipation of her upcoming nervousness. In other words, she becomesnervous about the prospect of being nervous. When the meeting is finallyfinished, a huge wave of relief comes over her as she begins to let go of theanxiety. Yet the memory of the meeting remains in the forefront of her mind.She is convinced she embarrassed herself and that everyone present sawhow nervous she was when she spoke, and how foolish she acted in themeeting. She recalls that in front of the boss she stammered, paused toolong, her face turned red, and she won’t remember what to say. The moviesare replayed in her mind over and over and over again. 

Another individual would like to go to out socially— and, in fact, he is trulylonely—yet he never goes out as he is unbearably nervous when meetingnew people. Groups of people make things worse for him. The idea of talkingto unknown people scares the daylights out of him. He is certain people willstare at him and expose him as an imposter. He is afraid they will reject himand humiliate him. Even if they act nice, they’ll surely notice his flushed face,frozen look and stuttering speech. They’ll sense his discomfort, mistake it forarrogance and dislike him. He feels he has no way to win. And so he spendsthe night alone again. He is in his comfort zone at home. Home is the onlyarea in which he feels totally at ease. Home is the only place he can relax. Hehasn’t gone out in seven years. In public, people with social anxiety feel that everyone is scrutinizing theirevery move and judging them, despite the rational knowledge that this is notthe case. Socially anxious people cannot relax in public. They cannot enjoythemselves when they are out. They can never truly settle down when othersare around. To them, it always seems like other people are negativelyjudging them. Regardless of their rational thoughts, they still feel extremelyself-consciousness while they are in the presence of others. For many, it isnearly impossible to relax and focus on anything other than the anxiety andthe fear. The anxiety is agonizing, making it easier to avoid social situationsand other people completely. Social anxiety is an extreme fear of social situations and conversing withother people which creates feelings of self-consciousness, fear of judgment,evaluation, and criticism. This often leads to feelings of inadequacy,humiliation, and depression. Social anxiety disorder (or social phobia) causes relationship problems formillions of people all over the world every day of their lives. In the UnitedStates, studies have recently shown social anxiety disorder to be the thirdlargest psychological disorder in the country. Such anxiety affectsapproximately 15 million Americans each year. In general, social anxiety isnot well understood by the mental health care field. As a result, people withsocial phobia are frequently misdiagnosed. Socially anxious people have beenmisdiagnosed as “schizophrenic”, “manic-depressive”, “clinically depressed”,and “personality disordered” to name a few. Often, anxiety exists together with depression or bipolar disorder. 

An example of a specific social phobia is the fear of speaking in front ofgroups. On the other hand, generalized social anxiety makes a personanxious, nervous, and uncomfortable in the vast majority of social situations.People who suffer from social anxiety disorder typically experienceconsiderable emotional distress in situations such as: Introductions to other peopleCriticism and JudgmentsBeing the center of attention (e.g., birthdays)Having someone watch while doing somethingTalking to people in positions of authority (e.g., doctors, PhDs and police)Social encounters, especially with strangersMaking “chit-chat” at social engagements The physiological symptoms that are associated with social anxiety frequentlyinclude intense dread, a quickening heart rate, blushing face, dry throat andmouth, shaking, difficulty swallowing, and muscle tension. Constant,pervasive, ongoing and intense anxiety is the most common symptom. People with social anxiety know that their anxiety does not make rationalsense. We know now that each one of us has two “types” of brain – theemotional brain and the thinking brain. These account for our emotionalintelligence and traditional intelligence. Therefore, knowing something is notthe same is not the same as feeling it. Sometimes we have feelings that areinconsistent with our thoughts. This is frequently the case in anxious people.They feel anxious despite their rational knowledge that there is nothing to beafraid of. 

Here are a few tips to help alleviate your anxiety… 1.     Think of the brain as a computer. In order for a computer to run any program at peak efficiency, it must have sufficient memory, disk space and processing speed. Many individuals with problems of impulsivity, disorganization, and distractibility do not have sufficient RAM (i.e., short-term memory), disk space (i.e., long-term memory) or processing speed in their brains due to underactivity in the prefrontal and temporal lobes of the brain. To best run the programs, the hardware (the brain) must be first optimized and then the programs (the information) need to be reinstalled (as it wasn’t properly received the first time through). Once the brain is running efficiently, strategies need to be introduced to help them be more effective at home, at work and in social relationships.  It is essential to improve the brain (biological), the outlook of the individual (psychological), and the intersections between the person and their environment (social) (Amen, 2001). One particular part of the brain has been shown to be involved in shifting from one thought to another – the anterior cingulate gyrus. When the anterior cingulate is too active, it results in people getting stuck in certain thought patterns and behaviors. Many difficulties with anxiety and depression have to do with a lack of flexibility of thought (or obsessing on certain negative thoughts) and may be related to an overactive anterior cingulate. If the rigidity of your thoughts and behaviors are causing difficulty in your relationships, you may want to discuss with your doctor the possibility of a serotonergic medication such as Prozac, Zoloft or Paxil which has been shown to be helpful in calming down the anterior cingulate gyrus (Amen, 2001). 2.     Eliminate all toxic elements from your lifestyle. This includes caffeine, alcohol, marijuana, cocaine, methamphetamines, nicotine, and sugars. For instance, marijuana use damages the physiology of the brain decreasing blood flow to key areas and reducing overall effectiveness. Marijuana use is especially harmful to the temporal lobes, which play an important role in memory, emotional stability, learning and temper control. Substance abuse of all kinds is particularly harmful to brain functioning. For example, a study done at UCLA demonstrated that cocaine addicts had 23 percent less brain activity overall compared to a gro